luxe

pavel again
Originally uploaded by natashafialkov.

so, after my hysterics last night, and not answering my phone, to the point that butter texted me to ask if i was mad, i finally fell asleep, and woke up at 3, when jake left and had an awful panic attack, which i rarely have anymore. my skin was crawling, i couldn’t breathe, i think my pain patch had run out, and i had also worked myself into a hysterical frenzy. i was scared to take a xanax because it makes me really depressed the next day, but it didn’t. i got up and showered, for the third time that day and went back to sleep. i need to chill out. i apologize for that awful post. i feel like i should delete it, but that wouldn’t be a journal, would it?

i got some really nice emails, and it makes me feel so good that not only do my friends and hubby act nice to me even though i am a lunatic, but people i don’t yet know are concerned. that is so incredibly nice.

i feel somewhat better today. i will see what happens. and i may take my wheel to work. that always makes the day go better. you know. and i owe some of my sweeties out in the blogosphere some yarn!! i just need to make things and i will feel like myself. my normal crazy self.

oh, i forgot to say, i got a dressmaker’s form, complete with the original shipping box from monkey wards from 1950, in really great shape. i am going to build something around it, if i can figure out how to do it, to display knits on…i would love to find a kid’s one…maybe a doll?…but i am thinking that i will try to make a woman’s blody with branch like arms to hand the knits on…can i build it? dunno. i will try though. it was 35 bucks and i talked them down to 25. a steal .there was also a huge star shaped victorian wall hung coat rack that was not that expensive, but i have made next to nothing this week, so i held back. i forgot to take photos of the farmer’s market again. drat!!

the sheepy in the above photo is from my secret pally, and that is pavel’s favorite sleepy place, since he was little, as you can tell, since he doesn’t fit there anymore. that is my drop spindle spun yarn.