horsie!
amy and i went to the berry farm yesterday and we got to pet their sweet horse, and get spit on by the llama, who was gross. but cute. it chased me. well, it was fenced in, but still.
i have the studio mostly set up. it looks incredible. i love it. i need a stool for my desk, and to move the two arm chairs in from the shop so i can have a visitor. and i have a tv in there so it will be no big deal to spin in there instead of the bedroom. i told jake that we could now turn the bedroom into an actual bedroom. i think he would like that. i moved most of the yarn out of the bedroom. setting up the studio really has been like putting stuff in a new purse. a big, pink, awesome, giant purse.
i am pooped, though. my energy levels are crap at the best of times, and i just want the shop to be closed and get going on things.
i found out that my parents are moving to iowa. my mom has been sucking up, and told jake but didn’t say a word to me. i think it will be a good thing. she can be near the grandchildren, and will probably have the whole “absence makes the heart grow fonder” sort of thing going on with me. she will think she likes me better than she does. she kept asking me why i hadn’t called, if i was mad at her, despite the fact that she hadn’t called me either. when i told her i have been really busy, she asked me what i was doing. hmmm. sigh.
gabe was hanging out by the shop when amy and i stopped in to pick some stuff up, and i told him he could have the old sign in front of the shop. i told him i wanted a clean break. i didn’t want anymore connections. he asked if that meant him, too. i really want to work on stuff together, but i don’t know if he will grow out of all this stuff he does. i don’t know the future of us making things together. he says he is thinking them through. i told him that sketching things out and then making a prototype is the way to go. he won’t listen. i get to the point that i get tired of even trying. i don’t even have the energy to do the things i need to do, let alone mothering someone else. this includes other people. people are so sensitive when it comes to their own feelings, yet don’t realize the least bit that they hurt other people’s feelings. you know? we hate other people, or look down on them for being the same as us. for being spoiled, or lazy, or whatever. we see ourselves in them, and we don’t want to think we are like that.
i spun up the last of the pink/blue color batch in the merino. gorgeous! you will have to take my word for it because the camera is out again being fixed. goddamn thing.
xo,
n.