luxe

man, i had a bad run. the last week or so i have just been feeling like poo. yesterday, worse and today, really bad. i am not exactly sure what the deal was. i did a bit of snooping on a new site i found called www.butyoudontlooksick.com that basically deals with all kinds of things that we deal with…at first, i thought it was just the lady problems that were making me flare up, i guess that is pretty normal in all of the maladies i have, but it got really bad. i had the sweats, the chills, heebie jeebies, i am not sure if i had a bad batch of patches. i ended up taking a shower, sitting down and drying off, getting dressed and back into bed and then basically getting back into the shower. by the 6th time, i took a chill pill (literally) a pain pill, put new patches on and was so exhausted that i sat down in the shower. i am not sure what it was that helped, but by the time i got out, i felt human, was able to watch ugly betty with jake and go online! wha?

i am super behind in getting any work done, getting orders out, returning and checking my email. it is beyond frustrating. i know i can only do what i can do, but it doesn’t change the fact that it drives me crazy. when i can’t even get myself somewhat under control with medications, i really start to freak out. i have been more emotional than i usually am, i am sure due to hormones, but still, when i don’t do anything, not even things i enjoy…don’t read a book, knit, talk on the phone, make something…anything, it just drives me crazy. i don’t wanna whine anymore, i just wanted to vent a bit.

jake is so sweet to me. he keeps asking what he can do, what he can get, what can he make…meanwhile, i haven’t even done a minimum of housework, cooked dinner, scooped litterboxes, nothing. i barely can get out of bed and take a shower. i am too tired to make a cup of coffee. he is just so kind. he never makes me feel guilty. he acts like it is crazy for me to think i should help out around the house, or do anything more than lie in bed all day. i don’t know that i could work as hard as he does, come home and do whatever needs to be done and still be so nice and sweet. i don’t think i could. i love you jakie. you is the best. you my flowa.

okay, gotta check some emails. to-morrow, as jake always says, i will feel better.

mwah!
n.